I’m Worried about Seeking Help because…


My abuser might find out…

This is always a risk and we will help you safety plan when you come for your appointment or over the phone to help you get here.  Everything you share with us is privileged and confidential (with a few exceptions outlined next), which means we will not share your information with anyone! We won’t even acknowledge knowing who you are! The only exceptions are: 1) if you tell us that a child or disabled/elderly individual is being abused we must report this (we will always tell you that we are reporting and include you in the process), 2) if you tell us that you are actively suicidal or homicidal then we must take steps to protect you or others, 3) if we receive a court order, and 4) if you are a minor requesting help for yourself there are some limitations to confidentiality depending on your age (we will always be open and honest with you about what is and is not private).

I am not sure I want to leave/they will pressure me to leave…

Our only interest is your safety.  We will never pass judgement or pressure you towards any choice.  We believe that you are the expert in your own life and emphasize the importance of autonomy, self-determination, and free choice.  We believe that you have been controlled enough by your partner and would never want to take over that control.  Our goal is to provide emotional support, options, resources, and help you find safety.  We will support you and provide services whether you stay with your abuser, choose to leave, or leave and return to your abuser.

I don’t have “proof” of the abuse. They won’t believe me…

We believe our clients.  We are not investigators and will not seek to prove your abuse.  You do not need evidence of abuse to receive our services.

I never reported to police, will you still help me?

Yes! We do not require a police report, conviction, or any other external source to validate your story. 

There was no physical violence/I was never injured/my abuse is not as bad as other victims…

 Abuse comes in many forms (see Types of Domestic Violence) and all abuse is harmful and traumatic.  Often verbal and emotional abuse is more damaging than physical abuse but the wounds are not readily visible. We also know that abuse escalates over time and hope to provide help before that happens.